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August 28, 2014
Culture

On your bike

Seeing the sun in Spring can give you the jolt of energy you need to get on your bike and ride! However, finding the sort of attire that suits a steep hill climb as well as a glass of wine demands a little strategy.

  • Illustration: Jasmin Neophytou
  • Words: Joshua Fanning and Marie Totsikas

FOR THE GENTLEMAN –

Your competitive spirit may cringe as the lycra-clad louts whiz past, but enjoy the journey with this comfortable kit that gets you there without waxing your legs.

man

Head
Putting the compulsory helmet law debate to one side, your noggin knocker needs to be as close to invisible as possible. Giro’s low profile Savant Road Helmet is perfect.

Neck
There will be sweat – oh yes – there will be sweat. A handkerchief around your neck can quickly be deployed to the brow upon arrival to maintain a cool outward facade (while your knees gently wobble). Ralph Lauren’s RRL label does them best.

Shirt
Chambray is that elegant fabric which, whilst not hiding your sweat patch, makes it look more fetching. Think: Ernest-Hemmingway-at-the-tiller-of-a-skiff-amongst-the-chop type sweat patch. 

Legs
We’re in love with the Topo web belts at RHD. The handsome aluminium clasp is the best and will do well in keeping your Saturdays Surf NYC ‘Jonas’ shorts at your waistline, above any plumbing cracks.

Feet
You could do worse than a pair of Nike Free 4.0 V2 for the hill climbs and subsequent lawn lazings at Coriole or Fall From Grace. Keep it fun with a cheeky pair of Chup socks too.

Wrist
By now, millions of tons of yellow rubber wristbands have been dumped in bins around the world. Shinola Detroit is an American you can wear with pride.

Take away
It’s a single use accessory but the Meriwether Montana leather wine bottle carrier is pretty spiffy; a little nod to those old photos of Le Tour (the fun ones where competitors light cigarettes and drink beer with each other).

FOR THE LADY –

So, Spring has sprung. And because the weather allows, you should be making the most of this time. So get on your bike. But please, do so with some degree of style and grace – the last thing you or unsuspecting city workers want is a flashing of your knickers or an unsightly bulging of flesh to shock them into an awakened state. We have coffee for that.

lady

Legs
Because you ride your bike to work, you now have primo legs. That’s just a fact of life. Now, please proceed to share your gams (tastefully) with the world and wear a mid-length dress. If you’re flailing about in a panic, picturing your skirt tragically tangled in your bike chain, you need to look to the women of Europe. These specimens of the same species ride around the crazy cobbled roads gracefully and safely. It can be done, just don’t misinterpret these directions and wear some kind of ridiculous ball gown. And if you need to know why you should avoid slim-line skirts on a bike, you probably shouldn’t remove your training wheels and attempt the big bad road.

More legs
Part two of my gam argument takes place in the realm of shorts. No, not Britney-esque distressed denim hot pants. I’m talking about a long line pair of culottes, perhaps with a beautifully tailored pleat running down the front? (“Oh Yes!” you should be exclaiming gleefully.) Try them in a pastel shade, or a tasteful and classic print like the ever-trusty houndstooth.

Fabric
When you’re late and must race to work with the zeal of a sweaty teenage boy on heat, take a moment to think about fabric. Cotton (and deodorant) is always going to reign supreme. You need to let those filthy pits breathe, so wear shorter sleeves and layer with a cute angora sweater when you cool down, ensuring you forever avoid the label of Smelly Sally in the workplace.

Feet
If you fail to walk in heels, you’re going to fail epically riding in them. And if you are one of the blessed few that can ride safely teetering on your trotters, consider the stylish sturdiness of the Swedish Hasbeen. Wooden and strong, (to avoid natural heel shredding), these babies come in an array of heel heights and colours, and will prevent you channeling Jerry Seinfeld riding around in pristine sneakers. And just incase you’re revolting enough to flirt with the idea – riding in thongs is not a thing. Ever.

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